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Loss of parent with Mesothelioma – A surviving child’s experience

Catherine A. Murphy

It is never easy for a child who has lost a parent to the fangs of death. It is even worse when they lose them to a dreaded disease such as mesothelioma that could have been prevented if employers of individuals working in the asbestos industry were just a little more concerned about the health of their employees.

My experience is no different from any other child who has lost their parents to mesothelioma. It all started with dad working in the shipyard that built submarines for the navy during World War II. Still I can remember him coming home and boasting about this new material that will revolutionize the way in which building ventilation will be designed. At that time, asbestos use was mainly used in the military, but due to his knowledge of asbestos, he went on to be a leading supervisor in many construction projects.

Fast-forward thirty years; I started noticing him breathing as if he was running out of breath. He then started complaining of chest pains. That was when I decided to let him be checked out. I was simply flabbergasted when we were told that he had mesothelioma. Shortly after, mom started having the same symptoms. But how, I began to ask myself, only to be told by her doctor that she became exposed to the asbestos particles while handling dad’s cloths from the shipyard. This was a double blow for me as both had mesothelioma in its most advanced state and were both given less than six months to live.

I decided to make this time left with both my parents as memorable as possible. I tried to do things with them that would take their mind off the disease. Behind their backs, I was also able to file and win an asbestos claim. Therefore, I was able to channel this money into the preparations for travel into the next life. Now they are gone I am left to ponder about life, how we may feel that it will last forever but it can be taken away from us so easily.

Although I was able to spend some time with my parents before I lost them to mesothelioma, their passing still devastated me. Their final six months went by so fast, I keep wondering if I did enough to help them. I actually had to register myself into counseling for a while to help me deal with my tragedy. Actually, I met quite a few other individuals in a support group who were able to help me also with my bereavement. They provide me with moral support, reading material that enabled me to better understand the disease and just the assurance that I am not alone in the world as there are many other individuals who have lost their parents to mesothelioma.

In memory of my parents, I decided to donate the remaining portion of their asbestos claim to the development and continued research for an earlier detection and cure for mesothelioma. This has helped me a lot, as now my parents’ death will bring about good for other mesothelioma sufferers.

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